When you’re working toward a goal that’s important to you, whether in your career, leadership role, business, or personal life, it’s hard when things don’t go as planned. Yet these moments of discomfort almost always hold valuable lessons. The key is learning how to recognize them.
As an executive coach and leadership consultant in Omaha, I’ve found that many leadership challenges stem from patterns we don’t even realize we’re repeating.
Sometimes, an unexpected outcome is simply a sign that you need a new plan.
If you notice the same repeating pattern, you may have slipped into Einstein’s definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over while expecting different results.
Recognizing Repeating Patterns
Your first instinct is often to blame others because they’re not living up to your expectations. It’s harder to recognize your role in creating the situation when the outcome doesn’t match your desires.
So, where do you begin? The question becomes: What is this trying to teach me?
Get Quiet and Go Within
Instead of reacting immediately, give yourself space.
Allow the chatter in your head to calm down. Take a few long, deep breaths. Breathe in for a count of four, hold for four, and then breathe out for a count of 8. This simple practice works because your mind can’t focus on multiple things at once.
Breathing works because it gives your mind something else to do.
Ask Better Questions
When you’re calm, ask yourself:
- What is at the root of this issue?
- Why does this situation bother me?
- Is there something specific that’s triggering me?
- What might I not be seeing?
Then sit quietly, continuing to focus on your breath.
Often, the answers begin to reveal themselves.
The deeper question is, what needs to change? Not externally, internally. What do you need to do differently? Maybe it’s time to let something go. Perhaps you need to communicate your expectations more clearly.
You might need to pause to consider how much someone else already has on their plate before assigning them additional responsibilities. Or maybe you need to be honest about how far you’re being stretched and give yourself permission to say no.
Small Changes Create Big Results
Meaningful personal development and leadership growth rarely happen through dramatic overhauls. Instead, make one small change.
Try one new approach. One different conversation. One new boundary.
It’s about doing one thing differently and seeing if it has a ripple effect. Maybe it’s exactly what you want. Or you might need to adjust if you realize more tweaking is needed.
Both outcomes provide valuable information.
Lasting Change Requires Going Deeper
True change, that builds a better future, doesn’t happen by only altering what’s on the surface.
Whether you’re focused on executive leadership development, organizational change, or personal growth, sustainable progress requires a willingness to go deeper and understand what’s at the very core of the issue.
If different actions don’t address this, then don’t be surprised when old patterns keep resurfacing.
At the end of the day, you’re not responsible for anyone else’s happiness or fear. But more importantly, no one else is responsible for how you feel.
If you can find harmony with another, new paths with greater understanding and collective consideration can be formed.
When you fully embrace change, it reveals what’s needed to build a better tomorrow, and the role you play in creating it.
Does change have you feeling the panic of the unknown?
If you need a little encouragement, click here for more support on your journey. And, as always, email me if I can help you on your journey.
